It’s important to step back and to give yourself space. That means setting boundaries,deciding what is too much, and taking time out for yourself. It also means deciding if you should break up, if you want to stay together, and if you want to move out (if you’re living together). These decisions can all be intensely difficult. But, eventually, your own mental health is important too. It’s important to protect yourself as a first step – you can’t help anyone if you are falling apart.
Inpatient or Residential Treatment
Is there something that you can do to help? Does he need a sponsor, as an alcoholic needs a sponsor in Alcoholics Anonymous? (I would venture to guess that the answer to this is YES.) Finally, with all your support and good intentions explained and demonstrated, contract with him to stay sober. Promise that you will do all you have committed to and that he must do the same.
Seek and Accept Support:
Funds may be drained to purchase alcohol, or the spouse struggling with addiction may have difficulty maintaining employment. In severe cases, legal issues (like DUIs) and medical expenses arise, adding to the household’s financial burden. This level of financial instability can create pervasive stress and conflict within the marriage. It can affect every aspect of life, from career and finances to physical and mental health. But it can have an especially devastating effect on the interpersonal relationships in a person’s life—especially those closest to them.
Your Support System Is Begging You To Leave
For example, someone might have a problem with drinking but deny it to themselves or their loved ones to avoid admitting they have a drinking problem. We have expert addiction specialists standing by ready to speak confidentially with you. Individualized treatment programs delivered in a comfortable, relaxed setting promote healing in your recovery journey. You can offer to attend counseling sessions with them or help research local rehab facilities, showing that you are supportive of their journey.
Habits for Proper Mental Health
That might not be today, but they might eventually. Most people eventually move into rehab because of their social networks and connections, and as their partner, you have a lot of influence. Many people require detox to help manage withdrawal from alcohol and other drugs.
These emotional responses are a result of the reward circuit as it interacts with different parts of the brain. Someone whose brain chemistry has changed due to long-term use of drugs or alcohol has lost the ability to control substance use behaviors. It may appear that the individual has chosen alcohol or my husband chooses alcohol over me drugs over family, but science and physiology prove otherwise.
Luckily we got our charges reduced and both had to do a bit of PTI. His mother wanted him to see an abuse counselor and for us to get couples counseling. He apparently was going and wanted to “get clean for me.” His mother told me hated himself for hurting me. I was told he would Alcohol Use Disorder do anything to repair our marriage. You need to know that your experience with an alcoholic spouse is traumatic and damaging to you and your children. So long as you stay with your alcoholic spouse, you’ll be sharing the responsibility for those bad decisions.
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- I walked out of the bedroom into the living room to find that he had ripped things off of the walls of the apartment that we were living in at the time and broke them.
- My husband of more than 10 years is an alcoholic.
With the right support and intervention, there is hope for a healthier, happier future for both you and your partner. All I wanted was it to just work out and spend our lives together. He has treated me so badly at times because he’s just not himself when the addiction takes hold. As far as recovering from an addiction goes, relapse is a part of recovery.
Tips on encouraging an alcoholic partner to seek help:
The topic of your arguments is whether your husband married you to spend time with you or his friends. His excuse is that he doesn’t really like to drink alcohol too much, but he has to drink when everyone else is already drinking. Whoa, that’s a tall order, I know, how can you not take it personally?